Codechild

The rest of the pictures I took in San Diego have now been posted.

Random sampling:

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It seems to me that the measure of a person can be determined when they are at their worst. That is, when the person is going through difficult things. People who live their live trouble free just advancing slowly will ultimately have less depth than those that go through troubles and hardship.

The more pain you have in your life, either you will be broken, or you will gain experience and excel past those who have not gone through the same hard things.

Since my accident I have found myself trying to assign blame for what happened to me to someone or something. It seems someone should be responsible for such a terrible thing. I have been unable to assign any blame, and I don’t think I should be thinking that way anyway. Circumstances added up and the accident was the result. Trying to assign a cause to it holds me back from seeing it as it really is.

I feel sometimes like giving up. What happened is a terrible thing, but I must choose to look past it and fight for what I believe in.

I believe in continuing to live and having hope to face every day. I don’t believe in giving up or backing down. I must not give up or be afraid.

I have not cried heavily since it happened. I want to very much. I often feel very dis-spirited and angry at what has happened. I feel it is wrong.

Despite that, what matters is the present, not the past. The past is said and done. What is important is what I do with the future.

As expected, the pull tabs for cheap chocolate pudding are worthless.

Quality of life seems to be driven by challenge. You have to “fight” and “strive” to do well. Being bored or feeling underutilized is a sad skewed perception of the american dream.

The corrupt american dream is one of pursuing ease. Ease should not be pursued. That is laziness. Happiness is found in a job well done and a short rest afterwards. Bravery and confidence should be goal words for the next generation.

I just recently was in a major car accident. I had a three hour surgery to have a metal rod placed inside my right femur, and my left ring finger is broken in the middle of my hand, so my left hand is in a cast of sorts.

God spared my life. The combined head on collision speed was like driving 72 mph into a brick wall. I am lucky many more bones in my leg did not break. God protected me as he wished. It still hurts. It hurts a lot. It will take a while before I can walk again.  Physical therapy is painful. But being alive is most important.

I am using my time stuck immobile to do some computer work as I can. Typing with one hand is very difficult. So I have a new improved website. Right now I am running Wordpress, with Coppermine, this is a temporary solution of ease. I will be working on my own CMS system for my site, but that will require both hands and more time so this will do for now.